Hoe je angst overwint: Tips voor persoonlijke groei

06/19/202406/19/2024 Brenda Casteleyn

“Let fear be a counselor and not a jailer.” – Anthony Robbins

The knot in your stomach, the clammy sweat, the feeling that you might throw up... What are you afraid of? And what if that fear is holding you back from doing what you really want to do? Unfortunately, I speak from experience. For years, I was afraid to pursue my dreams because I thought I wasn't 'good enough' yet. As a result, I stayed stuck in preparation mode and didn't dare to go for it. Now, with my third book published, I look back in amazement and realize how simple it actually was to overcome my fears. You just need to remember how you were as a baby. I'd like to share some tips with you.

1. Channel Your Inner Baby

Remember how you took your first steps as a baby. Were you afraid of falling then? Did you tell yourself that you could never do it? No, you just kept falling and getting back up until you could do it. Use that determination as inspiration to overcome your fears.

Tip: Take small, manageable steps towards your goal. Every small step forward is a victory, even if you sometimes fall.

2. Follow an Example

Babies always have an example of how to do something and have a sort of radar to mimic it. You can do the same by visualizing yourself doing it wonderfully. Try to see, feel, and smell it with all your senses. Your brain doesn't know the difference between imagination and reality, and this will activate certain neural pathways that help you face your fears. It might sound strange, but it really helps.

Tip: Visualize your success and imagine how you achieve your goal. Use all your senses to make the experience real.

3. Change Your Posture

By adopting the right posture, you'll start to feel different too. When someone feels bad, they slump their shoulders. But it works the other way around too; just by straightening your back, you'll start to feel better. Stand up straight, take a deep breath, and smile. This sends positive signals to your brain and can reduce your fear.

Tip: Use a powerful body posture to boost your self-confidence. Try the 'power pose' and notice the difference.

4. Just Start

A baby doesn't start with a detailed action plan in mind; they just go for it and learn what works through trial and error. Along the way, they will often fall, but each fall is an indication to adjust their method. This doesn't mean you shouldn't prepare; you can research how to approach something, but don't get stuck in preparation.

Tip: Just begin. Take that first step, no matter how small, and learn from your experiences.

5. Seek Support

The encouragement of friends and family is crucial. They help you celebrate your victories. Have you ever seen a mother tell her child, 'What a loser you are, trying to walk for the third time and still failing'? No, every small step is celebrated enthusiastically. Gather your personal cheerleaders: friends, family, colleagues—everyone who can encourage and inspire you. Even your neighbor with his dog can give you that extra boost of confidence.

Tip: Ask for support from your personal cheerleaders. Their encouragement can give you that extra push you need.

6. Celebrate Your Successes

This tip builds on the previous one. Make sure to celebrate every small step in the right direction, no matter how insignificant it may seem. We sometimes have the tendency to compare our steps to the final result and see how we fall short. A baby doesn't do that; they are happy with every extra step. By celebrating your success, you boost your self-confidence and create new neural pathways to success.

Tip: Celebrate every small victory. It helps you stay motivated and builds your self-confidence.

7. Use Positive Self-Talk

Think about how you would talk to a baby learning to walk. Talk to yourself in the same way: you are 'amazing' and you can do it. Think about the small and large achievements you've already accomplished in your life; this will help you realize how amazing you are, how amazing we all are. Keep doing this until you firmly believe it.

Tip: Talk positively to yourself. Repeat affirmations like "I can do this" and "I am strong."

In Conclusion

Fear can often hold us back from doing what we really want. But with these seven tips, you can overcome your fears and take action. Remember, it's not about eliminating fear entirely but working through it and coming out stronger on the other side. So next time you're faced with something you're afraid of, laugh at it, use these tips, and go for it!

What are your experiences with overcoming fear? Share your stories and tips in the comments below!

#OvercomeYourFear #PersonalGrowth #Motivation #ConquerFear #ButterflyEffects

The Power of Visualization: How Your Dreams Become Reality

05/16/202405/16/2024 Brenda Casteleyn

“Create the highest, grandest vision possible for your life, because you become what you believe.” – Oprah Winfrey

Have you ever fantasized about achieving your biggest dreams? Whether it's success in your career, improving personal relationships, or achieving athletic performance, visualization can be the key to realizing them. From top athletes to successful entrepreneurs, many have harnessed the power of visualization to reach their goals. But how can you effectively use this powerful tool in your own life?

The First Step: Acknowledge Your Dreams

My own journey with visualization began when I had the courage to admit that I actually wanted to become an author. For years, I told myself I didn't know enough, which kept me stuck in my comfort zone. Recognizing your true dreams is the crucial first step. Without acknowledgment, your dreams remain just that—dreams.

Visualize Your Future

Imagine what your life looks like when your dream has become reality. Who are you in five years? What does your day look like, what are you doing, and who are you talking to? Make this a vivid, sensory experience. Use all your senses to bring this vision of the future to life.

The Power of Sensory Visualization

Why is sensory visualization so effective? Research shows that our brains cannot well distinguish between a real experience and an imagined one. By imagining that your dream is already a reality, your brain begins to look for evidence to support it, which helps you to actually realize your dream. It's like when you buy a new car and suddenly notice that many others have the same brand. When your focus is directed somewhere, you notice it more. Through visualization, you also start to notice more opportunities that help you make your dream come true.

The Example of Michael Phelps

A prime example of the effectiveness of visualization comes from Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps. His coach, Bob Bowman, taught him the 'videotape' technique, where Phelps would visualize every race in detail before going to sleep and upon waking. He visualized every stroke, turn, and finish as if he were playing a movie. This method prepared him for all possible scenarios during competitions, contributing to his exceptional performances and making him the most decorated Olympian of all time.

But it doesn't have to be that spectacular. I myself have successfully used visualization in the past to, for example, be nerve-free during exams or presentations.

Practical Exercises for Daily Use

A simple daily exercise can be to spend five minutes each morning or evening visualizing your success. Imagine celebrating your victories, the challenges you've overcome, and the satisfaction you feel. Make sure you use all your senses in this exercise to trick your brain into believing it's real.

Start Today!

Why not start today using visualization to realize your dreams? Take five minutes of your day to imagine your biggest goals as if they have already been achieved. With this powerful method, you are well on your way to unlocking your potential and making your dreams come true. Remember: visualizing is more than just daydreaming; it is an active step towards personal transformation.

In Conclusion

After reading about the power of visualization, what dream would you like to visualize? Share your dream in the comments below and let us know how you plan to use these visualization techniques to achieve your goal. What is the first small step you can take today to get closer to your dream?

The Greatness in Each of Us: Three-Day Journey with Joseph McClendon III"

04/10/202404/10/2024 Brenda Casteleyn

“Each and every one of us possesses a seed of greatness inside of us that beacons to be discovered and used.” – Joseph McClendon III

After an enlightening experience with Tony Robbins where I confronted my limiting beliefs, I was ready for the next step. This year brought me to another impressive figure and friend of Tony Robbins: Joseph McClendon III. His titles are numerous - neuropsychiatrist, university lecturer, and top performance coach - but none do justice to the energy he radiates on stage (despite being 70 years old), an energy I first experienced alongside Tony Robbins.

Diving into Excellence

Where Tony Robbins' events focus on limiting beliefs and the question, 'am I good enough?', the event with Joseph immersed us in the world of unlimited possibilities. His approach? A powerful reprogramming of the brain to pave our path to excellence. It wasn't just about changing thoughts, but about a holistic journey through life, where we reconnected with our true self - a self that might have been led astray by trauma or sorrow.

An Intimate Community of Transformation

Unlike Tony's massive events, this seminar took place in the heart of Amsterdam and attracted a more intimate group - just 300 participants. The smaller scale provided room for personal interaction, deep questions, and a direct exchange of energy that's only possible in such a setting. The testimonies of transformations were not only inspiring; they were living proof of what's possible when we chase our dreams.

Dreams in Action

These three days were more than an event; they were a springboard into action. We received not only techniques to chase our dreams but also proof that it's possible. It was as if each story, each shared experience, further revealed our own potential and cleared the way for the reality of our dreams.

The Way Forward

With a head full of knowledge and a heart full of gratitude, I have returned from my journey with Joseph McClendon III. The echoes of the lessons will resonate with every step I take. The path ahead of us is open, ripe with the promise of personal growth and the fulfillment of our deepest ambitions.

In Conclusion

When was the last time you truly listened to your inner call? What steps are you taking to realize your dreams on the path of your own magnificent journey?

The Three Keys to Authenticity

02/13/202402/13/2024 Brenda Casteleyn

“"Be yourself. There are already so many others." - Loesje” – Loesje

In a world filled with social media and constant comparisons, the quest for authenticity is more relevant than ever. Stephen Joseph, a leading psychologist, emphasizes that true authenticity consists of three core facets: self-awareness, autonomy, and integrity in our actions and choices. But what do these facets mean for your daily life, and how can you apply them to live your most authentic self?

In my book 'Hoe was je dag' I invite you to explore your authentic self along with a walking partner. But you can also sort everything out for yourself.

Key 1. Self-Awareness: The Foundation of Everything

Self-awareness is the foundation of authenticity. It is a profound understanding of who you are, including your passions, fears, strengths, and weaknesses. This requires time and reflection. Questions like "What did I enjoy doing as a child?" or "When did I recently feel completely myself?" can shed light on your true nature and desires.

Key 2. Autonomy: Taking Control of Your Life

Authenticity also means being in charge of your own life. This involves making choices that align with your personal values, not those imposed by others. It takes courage to follow your own path, especially when it deviates from the expectations of others. So, ask yourself who has control over your life. Who possibly determines (along with you)? And what do you do to navigate your own course?

Key 3. Integrity: Living in Accordance with Your Values

The last facet, integrity, is about acting in accordance with your values and beliefs. This means staying true to yourself in your actions, words, and decisions. It is the authentic self that comes out in everything we do. So, ask yourself if you are being yourself or do you too often play a role? Do you follow your passions?

How Do You Know You're Authentic?

The path to authenticity is personal and unique. It requires self-reflection, and that's not always easy. Do you want to be confronted with who you are, what you want, or would you rather let sleeping dogs lie? Authentic living also requires an act of courage, not only to get to know yourself but also to stand up for yourself and claim your own authentic life.

Authenticity as a Philosophy of Life

Authenticity is more than a trend; it's a philosophy of life. Embracing the three facets enables you to lead a life that is rich and fulfilling, true to yourself, and resonant with your deepest desires and values.

In Conclusion

In our current time, where it's easy to get lost in the crowd and live according to others' expectations, authenticity offers a compass for personal freedom and self-expression. Let us, therefore, strive for a life in which we can fully embrace our authentic selves, thereby cultivating a deeper connection with ourselves and the world around us.

How authentic do you live? And what does authenticity mean to you?

Reading tip: Joseph Stephen, Authentic: How to be yourself and why it matters, 2017.

The Power of Quotes

01/29/202401/29/2024 Brenda Casteleyn

"Quotes are medicine for the brain." – Brenda Casteleyn

Ik ben gek op citaten want ik ontdekte de kracht van citaten al heel snel. Heel wat beroemde schrijvers, acteurs, zangers en andere bekendheden hebben citaten verzonnen. Maar ik vind het ook leuk om er zelf te verzinnen. En dat is meer dan alleen een leuke hobby, want citaten hebben een diepgaande impact op mijn leven gehad. Zo herinner ik me een periode waarin ik me vaak ergerde aan kleine, financiële ongemakken, zoals verkeerd terugbetaald worden in de winkel. Toen hoorde ik iemand zeggen: ‘ik maak me nooit meer druk over geld’. Niet zo geslaagd als citaat misschien, maar het bleef bij mij hangen en sindsdien begon ik die zin als een soort mantra te gebruiken. En het had een enorm effect. Langzaamaan kon ik een meer ontspannen houding aannemen ten opzichte van geld. Ik hoef me nu niet meer benadeeld te voelen als er weer eens een financiële tegenslag is, want… ‘ik maak me niet meer druk om geld’. Daarnaast gebruikte ik citaten om me te motiveren tijdens mijn studie, om me te troosten bij verdriet en bij tal van andere gelegenheden. Deze persoonlijke voorbeelden illustreren hoe een enkel citaat je perspectief en zelfs je gedrag kan veranderen.

Let's, therefore, list the ways quotes can enrich your life.

1. Quotes Comfort

A quote can express a feeling you struggle with and feel alone in. The relatability of the quote can then provide comfort. I find this one by Isabel Allende quite beautiful: "The biggest problem with people today is that they are afraid of suffering, so afraid of losing something. We have forgotten that loss is a part of life." Also, you can find solace in quotes about resilience and hope, which remind you of how others have overcome similar experiences. This quote by Nelson Mandela, for example: "The greatest glory in life lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall."

2. Quotes Motivate

A quote can motivate you to maintain a habit or pursue your goals. Maybe you need motivation to study for an exam or to go to the gym. This quote by Mark Twain might then help: "The secret of getting ahead is getting started." And when you hang such a quote somewhere visible, so you're confronted with it every day, it works as an affirmation or mental support.

3. Quotes Offer a New Perspective

A quote can prompt you to see something from a different angle. Sometimes you're so down in the dumps that you can't see anything positive anymore. Then this quote by Martin Luther King might help: "Only in the darkness can you see the stars." It gives you a new perspective on the difficult situation you're in and challenges you to see it not only as an obstacle but also as an opportunity to learn and grow.

4. Quotes Provide Insight

A quote can help you achieve something on a deeper level. For instance, I recently heard someone say: "better done than perfect." For a perfectionist, this might initially seem counterintuitive, but it can also lead to the insight that perfection actually leads to the opposite, namely that your quest for perfection becomes an obstacle to progress and completion. This quote can then lead to a more productive attitude, allowing you to derive more satisfaction from completed tasks and the process itself rather than just focusing on an unattainable ideal of perfection.

5. Quotes Inspire

A quote can inspire you to experience new things or tackle matters differently. Perhaps you're looking for some inspiration to find the right job in your life or to break out of your stagnant job. Then this quote by Confucius might inspire you: "Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life."

6. Quotes Improve Your Mood

Quotes can also be funny, and in that case, they can significantly improve your mood. How about this one: “The problem with doing nothing is that you never know when you're finished." - Groucho Marx

In Conclusion

Quotes are a fantastic tool to give your mental well-being an extra boost. What quotes have helped you? Do you have a favorite quote or a favorite author? Or are there other ways quotes have helped you that I haven't mentioned? Share it below.

The Power of Disappointment: 6 Steps to Turn Disappointment into Strength

01/20/202404/11/2024 Brenda Casteleyn

"Desire is the mother of disappointment." - Alexander Pola

I recently launched my third book. Although many had registered via LinkedIn, Facebook, and email, a flood of last-minute cancellations led to fewer attendees than expected. Naturally, I was initially disappointed, but the positive reactions from those present and the fact that I sold more books than there were guests made up for a lot. Have you ever experienced a similar disappointment? How did you handle it?

With these steps, you can turn your disappointment into strength.

Step 1. Acknowledge Your Feelings

It's normal to feel upset when things don't go as expected. Maybe you missed an opportunity, a promise was broken, or a goal was not achieved. That hurts. That evening after the launch, I gave myself time to feel and accept the disappointment. This is an essential step to turn disappointment into strength. In my article about 'constructief lijden(constructive suffering) I explain why it's so important to allow and give space to sadness and negative feelings.

Step 2: Explore Your (Limiting) Beliefs

Take a moment to reconsider your expectations. Were they realistic? Could I really have expected my launch to turn into a large event that was more crowded than my previous launches? Tony Robbins, now a famous speaker in stadiums, started with events for an audience of three people. So, I had to accept that growth takes time and that it's okay to start small.

Step 3. Redefine Your Goals and Expectations

Now that you've adjusted your beliefs, you can also redefine your goals and expectations. Instead of focusing on the number of attendees, I chose to appreciate what went well: the quality of the interactions and the feedback. This helped me revise my goals and focus on what's really important: the impact of my work and sharing insights.

Step 4: Build Resilience and Perseverance

With adjusted goals and expectations, you can now continue with renewed resilience and perseverance. Like Thomas Edison, who experienced many failures before his breakthrough, I saw this experience as a valuable insight on the way to my ultimate goal.

Step 5: Create a New Strategy

You now have enough motivation to work out a new strategy. In my case, that meant focusing on the power of 'butterfly effects' or starting small. Instead of fixating on the number of readers or followers of my author's page (which, by the way, has increased tenfold in the last three months), I can now focus on a real connection with readers.

Step 6: Improve Your Self-Image

Finally, use the experience of disappointment to develop gratitude for what you have learned and pride in how you handled it. The experience has already helped me to move forward with renewed strength and confidence.

In Conclusion

Disappointment can be painful, but it is also a powerful tool for growth and development. By embracing these feelings and learning from them, you transform yourself in ways you never thought possible. Often, the seeds of future success and happiness lie at the core of disappointment.

What setbacks have you had to deal with? How did you handle them?

Persoonlijke groei met Tony Robbins UPW Birmingham

Unleash the Power Within: Personal Growth with Tony Robbins

07/28/202304/11/2024 Brenda Casteleyn

“There is a powerful driving force inside every human being that once unleashed, can make any vision, dream or desire a reality.” – Tony Robbins

In my quest for personal growth and communication techniques, I had come across the name Tony Robbins for years, a guru in the field of NLP. His compelling approach and American style initially intimidated me, especially as I had already taken an NLP course and thought there was nothing new he could teach me. However, I decided to take the leap and participate in UPW (Unleash the Power Within), a four-day seminar with thousands of attendees. What I experienced there turned out to be a transformative journey that liberated me from my limiting beliefs and doubts.

Unleashing Inner Power

The UPW seminar surpassed all my expectations. It was no ordinary course; it was a deep immersion into my own feelings of doubt and uncertainty. Through this inner confrontation, I was able to transform into a liberated and authentic self. The intensive process, shared with thousands of others, led me to discover my true self and release long-standing limitations.

Firewalk

On the very first day, Tony puts you in a peak state that allows you to walk on fire without getting hurt. It symbolizes the triumph over fears. Many well-known individuals have personally been coached by Tony, including not only various U.S. presidents and renowned athletes but also Oprah Winfrey. You can find Oprah's Firewalk experience on YouTube as well: Firewalk .

Reflection and Personal Growth

Looking back on my personal growth journey, I see how my doubts used to hold me back. The inner voice that once hindered me from pursuing my dreams has now been replaced with unwavering self-assurance. I am finally capable of offering my own books with passion and inspiration, without questioning their worth. The feeling of liberation is indescribable and has significantly boosted my self-confidence.

Tony Robbins: An Inspiring Source

For those who want to learn more about Tony Robbins and his methods, he has written numerous books and can be seen in the Netflix documentary 'I'm Not Your Guru.' His powerful approach has inspired and transformed millions of people worldwide.

In Conclusion

The UPW seminar taught me that true power for change lies within ourselves. By acknowledging and letting go of our limiting beliefs, we can unleash our true potential and pursue our dreams with confidence. The experience was intense, but it positively transformed my life, and I am grateful for the insights gained during this extraordinary journey of self-discovery.

Tip: Tony Robbins: Netflix Documentary Tony Robbins I’m Not Your Guru

Constructive wallowing: how to beat bad feelings by letting yourself have them.

05/21/202304/11/2024 Brenda Casteleyn

“The only way out is through.” – Robert Frost

Who would have thought that positive thinking could also have negative consequences? Not really, of course. Positivity is good, but not when it means brushing your negative feelings under the rug.

Every day, you experience a range of emotions, from joy and gratitude to sadness and frustration. It may seem tempting to avoid or suppress negative emotions, but allowing yourself to feel those emotions is essential for your well-being. This is where constructive suffering comes into play. It is the art of embracing your emotions in a conscious and constructive way, and it can have a profound positive effect on your life.

What happens when you don't allow yourself to feel your emotions?

Firstly, they often get bottled up and suppressed. This can lead to a buildup of tension and emotional burden, making it harder to experience joy and satisfaction. Suppressed emotions can also cause physical symptoms such as headaches, stomachaches, and insomnia.

Moreover, ignoring your emotions can lead to negative coping mechanisms such as overeating, alcohol or drug abuse, or excessive use of social media. These behaviors often serve as temporary "escape routes," but they do not provide sustainable solutions and can even lead to further problems.

So, how can you embrace constructive suffering and process your emotions in a healthy way? One useful technique you can use is the "TRUTH" technique by Tina Gilbertson, which helps you acknowledge and understand your emotions.

The 'TRUTH'-technique

The technique works as follows:

Tell yourself the situation

Start by becoming aware of the situation that is bothering you. Identify and acknowledge the factual events that have taken place.

Realize what you're feeling

Allow yourself to become consciously aware of your emotions. Acknowledge and label them without judgment. Whether it's sadness, anger, fear, or disappointment, give yourself permission to feel.

Uncover self-criticism

Pay attention to any negative thoughts or self-criticism that arises. Recognize that these thoughts can prevent you from fully experiencing and processing your emotions. Sometimes you may think that you're not "allowed" to have certain feelings, but if, for example, you feel anger, there is no ethical dimension to it. You feel what you feel, and there's nothing you can do about it. It's simply a signal that something is not okay. Of course, it's a different story if you engage in negative behavior out of anger.

Try to understand yourself

Go deeper and try to understand why you feel a certain way. Ask yourself questions such as: Why does this situation affect me so much? Which personal beliefs or values are being triggered? Try to show understanding for yourself, without reasoning everything away. Just try to figure out what the feeling is trying to tell you.

Have the feeling

Allow yourself to fully experience your emotions without judgment. Don't be afraid to be sad, angry, or anxious. Acknowledge that these feelings are normal and human. Give yourself the space to cry, scream, or just be silent. Let the emotions flow through you without suppressing them.

Strategies for constructive suffering

Constructive suffering doesn't mean losing yourself in your emotions or getting trapped in them. It's about being consciously present with your feelings and processing them in a healthy way. Here are some strategies you can apply for constructive suffering:

Talking and sharing: Seek support from friends, family, or a therapist. Talk about your feelings and share your experiences. This can help you process your emotions and gain new perspectives.
Writing: Keep a journal where you can write down your thoughts and feelings. Writing can be a therapeutic outlet and help you better understand your emotions.
Listen to music that resonates with what you're feeling to better empathize with your emotions.
Meditation and mindfulness: Practice meditation or mindfulness to increase your awareness of the present moment. This can help you observe your emotions without getting entangled in them. By developing a non-judgmental and accepting mindset, you can cultivate a greater sense of self-awareness and emotional balance.
Healthy self-care: Take good care of yourself by getting enough rest, engaging in physical exercise, and consuming nutritious food. Allow yourself time to relax and participate in activities that bring you joy and fulfillment.
Seek professional help if needed: If you find that your emotions are overwhelming or you're struggling to process them on your own, don't hesitate to seek professional help. A trained therapist can guide and support you in processing your emotions effectively.

A journey towards insight and well-being

Remember that constructive suffering is a process that requires time and patience. It's important to be gentle and compassionate with yourself throughout this journey. Emotions can provide valuable insights and can help you grow and change. By allowing yourself to feel, understand, and grow, you can have a profound positive impact on your well-being and quality of life.

So, allow yourself to feel, understand, and grow. The butterfly effect of constructive suffering can have a significant impact on your life and help you thrive in your personal growth and well-being. And when negative emotions are acknowledged, positive thinking truly becomes effective.

Reading tip Gilbertson Tina, Constructive wallowing, How to beat bad feelings by letting yourself have them, Piatkus, 2014

7 Ways to create a positive ripple effect

03/13/202304/11/2024 Brenda Casteleyn

Many small ones make a big one (expression)

When you throw a small pebble into the water, ripple patterns are created that spread far out. A small action can have big consequences.

These 7 ways will help you create a positive ripple effect, for yourself or those around you. The 7 techniques all start from small efforts but have a big effect, a 'ripple effect'.

1. The 20-second rule

Why don't you get around to hitting the gym or starting a new habit? According to Shawn Achor - a happiness expert at Harvard University - you lack 'activation energy', that is the energy that sets you in motion. And in his book 'The Happiness Advantage' he explains how you can remedy that with the '20-second rule'. This means that you have to make the threshold to start as small as possible by making sure that you have started within 20 seconds. For example, prepare your sports bag so that you can leave immediately. But you can also use it to break bad habits: put your sweets on a higher shelf so that you always have to take a step to get to them.

2. The Pareto-principle

Dit werd uitgevonden door de Italiaanse econoom, Vilfredo Pareto die vaststelde dat 80% van de rijkdom bij 20% van de Italiaanse bevolking zat in het begin van de 20^th eeuw. Maar deze 80/20 verhouding zag hij ook nog in andere terreinen: wist je dat 20% van al je inspanningen zorgen voor 80% van je resultaten? Door te identificeren welke 20% van je inspanning de grootste resultaten opleveren, kun je je tijd en energie effectiever gebruiken en zo tijd overhouden voor de leuke zaken. Bekijk je to-do lijstje dus voortaan vanuit het Pareto-principe en kies eerst voor de taken met impact. Dat geeft ook een voldaan gevoel zodat de overblijvende taakjes peanuts zullen lijken.

3. The Hawthorne-effect

Dit effect stelt dat mensen zich anders gedragen wanneer ze weten dat ze in de gaten worden gehouden. Het was Elton Mayo die dat in de jaren ’20 van de vorige eeuw ontdekte toen hij in de Hawthorne-fabrieken van general Electric een experiment deed. Hij wilde nagaan of de arbeiders beter zouden presteren wanneer hun omgeving verbeterd werd. Maar wat bleek: zowel de arbeiders in de verbeterde fabriek als de anderen gingen erop vooruit. Het was de aandacht van de onderzoekers die beiden groepen aanzette tot betere prestaties. Misschien kan je daar eens aan denken als je wil dat je kinderen hun huiswerk maken of als je je partner wil aanmoedigen om huishoudelijke taken te doen.

4. The Zeigarnik-effect

Bluma Zeigarnik was een Russische psychologe (1900-1988), die geheugenexperimenten deed om een veronderstelling van haar promotor -Kurt Lewin- te testen. Kurt Lewin had op een terras in Berlijn gemerkt dat de obers nog goed wisten wat er geconsumeerd was aan tafeltjes die nog niet hadden afgerekend, maar vrijwel niets meer wisten van de klanten die al wel hun rekening hadden betaald. Zeigarniks experimenten toonden aan dat je beter onthoudt wat nog niet is afgewerkt. Dat klinkt ook heel logisch. Waarom zou je nog onthouden wat al gedaan is? Dat kan je gemakkelijk gebruiken om piekeren en uitstelgedrag aan te pakken of je motivatie op te krikken. In dit post I will list some tips about this effect.

5. The power of meditation

Often different thoughts and concerns are running through your brain. That makes you stressed and anxious. When you meditate, you become aware of that storm of thoughts and emotions but you only observe them and do nothing with them. By starting every day with a meditation, you relax. You reduce your stress and thus increase your emotional resilience. Moreover, it also has a positive effect on your brain, giving you more focus. When you start each day with a short meditation, you already have a head start to make your day a success.

6. The Law of Parkinson

Northcote Parkinson described how a task can sometimes take much longer simply because more time was allotted. For example, he describes how a woman with a lot of free time spends almost an entire day writing a postcard to her cousin. An hour goes into finding the map, then she has to search for her glasses for an hour, after which she spends another half hour finding her cousin's address. Then she needs an hour and a quarter to think of what to write on the card. Another half hour is lost to decide if she will bring her umbrella to post the card. Finally, there is also a half hour walk to the mailbox.

Dezelfde taak zou een drukbezette vrouw slechts enkele minuten kosten. De wet van Parkinson stelt dus dat de hoeveelheid werk zich uitbreidt in evenredigheid met de tijd die je ervoor beschikbaar hebt.

You may have experienced this yourself when you started working less and discovered that your household chores now seem to take longer. When you know you have more time, you do things differently, you procrastinate more or you allow yourself to work a little slower. The same applies to your finances: the larger your budget becomes, the more you spend. That explains why saving is sometimes difficult.

So make sure you set a realistic deadline for your tasks and decide in advance how much money you want to save. That way you can outsmart Parkinson's law.

7. Mirror work

What do you say to yourself in the mirror in the morning? Did you see another wrinkle or did you count more gray hairs? Or do you tell yourself you look great? What you say to yourself has a huge impact on your well-being. We are always our own biggest critic, but things can also be different.

Lisa Nichols, een wereldbekende spreker, gebruikte de spiegeloefening om haar depressie te boven te komen nadat ze een destructieve relatie eindigde. De oefening gaat als volgt: Praat tegen jezelf in de spiegel alsof je tegen je beste vriend praat en zeg de volgende 3 zinnen:

‘state your name’, I am proud of you because… and then list 7 items that you are proud of.

'state your name’, I forgive you for…and list 7 items for which you forgive yourself.

“State your name,” I commit myself to you to… and make a bold promise to yourself.

Lisa did this exercise for 30 days and was then able to prove to her doctor that she no longer needed Prozac, but had healed herself. You can watch Lisa's story and her mirror exercise in this. short video .

Welke van deze 7 methoden ga jij deze week eens uitproberen?